Monday, December 15, 2014

Street Art 817:1

Performing at the Franconia-Springfield Metro in VA
Playing for 30+ years (didn't even notice it's been so long)
Learned from fiddling and watching the other guys
Plays in church sometimes
Needs a new amp

Songs performed:
Lovely Day by Bill Withers
Smoke on the Water by Deep Purple

Held his guitar for a minute while he used the restroom (it's crazy how much strangers trust me, but that's cool). 
Checked something off my bucketlist: be a street artist. Although it was only for a few minutes and I didn't make a dollar. I credit that to my inability to play, but I'll get there. Next time. One day. Someday soon. 

Sunday, December 14, 2014

My Mom & Her Friends

On the subject of class reunions:

"You know, we should go to one of those reunions one of these days"

"We can't! Everybody's dead!"

Looking Thru Their Yearbook

On inquiring about old friends from high school: 
"I don't even like asking about people. They be dead.."

On teenage pregnancy amongst their peers:

"There's Cynthia! Remember when she got pregnant?" 
"Yea it was surprising when that happened"
"Why? She was a ho."

Saturday, December 6, 2014

Drunken Poetry

Prolly don't make no sense. My subconscious. Full of cliches. YOLF

La Cerveza Mas Fina

The shelf life of malt liquor
1 hour
1 quart

To write in this state
1 broken mind
no imagination
too much time

the room floats
the consumer is stable
sturdy as a rock
all is able to happen here

there are no fears
no inhibitions
to call someone would be a mistake

there's solace here
in this place
in this glass bottle
on this drunken tongue lingers
a malted heir
twisted words
and honesty

although it's not to be comprehended

words of courage are born here
bad habits don't form
no habits are bad
these are the actions that warm
no need for discipline
heed the warning

in this bottle
there is knowledge
truth and solace
nothing is wrong here


But what about sobriety

You fool

You think this is good for you


A dunce cap for you

sit there and entertain

let the people enjoy at your expense

entertain them Charlie

they will love you

Drink and be merry

they will love you

I promise

Friday, December 5, 2014

I Once Went to the West Coast

It was nice, not what I was expecting. The people weirded me out a little. Maybe I have too much of the east coast skepticism. I still wanna go to Berkeley tho.

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

The Planetary Society

Guess who met Bill Nye. You know, the science guy?

It was so sweeeeeeet!

Although I missed the whole speech messing around with my mom. She lucky I love her unconditionally. -___- (tbh it was nice sharing an experience with someone for a change)

It was about water discoveries in space, space exploration and all those exciting things. To be honest, I was more interested in the topic than he, but getting a celebrity that helped shape so much of my future as a child was a perk. 

However, I know I shouldn't be surprised, but he didn't want to hear my thank you it seemed. I get it, he gets it all the time and that's such a small part of his career. This man was extremely accomplished before the show. I mean, how do you think he got there in the first place! Yet, I wanted him to know how he helped shift the path of that little girl sitting on the floor in our apartment in Henrico. He wasn't the worse, but he wouldn't let me express it fully. It was jovial tho, he's good with the jokes. I find it hard to believe that one of my favorite things, as a 6 year old, or the way I learned the colors of the rainbow, had little interest in hearing about it. He did invite me to join the planetary society, and he told me that the love of science is something that never lets go once it grabs hold. But don't you see the hero you are Mr. Nye? You've inspired a generation of scientist, educators, etc. Some of which (like myself) would not have had the opportunity to become interested in STEM fields. Our schools, as we all know, don't always cut it. The communities are lacking sometimes, but the television.... we learn so much from it. We are educated thru the arts. Art of all forms,  be it writing, images, movement, whatever, it teaches something. 

Art is Science.

Where they meet, is faith. 

Art is Science is Faith

Monday, December 1, 2014

Sunday, November 30, 2014

The Emergence Community Art Collective

733 Euclid St. NW
Washington, DC

  1. e·mer·gence
    1. 1.
      the process of coming into view or becoming exposed after being concealed.
      "I misjudged the timing of my emergence"
      the process of coming into being, or of becoming important or prominent.
    2. "the emergence of the environmental movement"

Taking the Leap

I like my blog being hidden, cause I don't have to worry about criticism. But when I started, my intentions weren't too keep my thoughts to myself.

So I'll stop being a little bitch and post this for others to see.

Judge me. Please.

(But not really. You don't know me!)

Sunday, November 23, 2014

Would I call it an epiphany? Nah.


I came to the realization that I'm not interested in selling my soul in order to survive. I know I might regret this in the short run, but I know I'll be alright. I'll struggle a little to have a fulfilling life. This doesn't mean rising to fame and doing extravagant things all the time. I've also learned that I enjoy simplicity. This means that I will vote to make the most of my time. I will impress me. I will make a difference somewhere doing something important. I'll live for me and only me. I hope that in the wake of my self love I inspire others to rise as well, but I don't necessarily want to help anyone else cause honestly, I can't even help me. Does that make me a bad person?

Unfortunately I've been used and abused, not in a physical way really. Although I've seen a bit of that too, but more so I've been abused mentally. My emotions are taken advantage of regularly, because I'm a woman of passion and this is known. But I need to redirect my heart to more productive activities. I'm over it. I'm not saying this is my mantra, to now be mean and heartless, but I am jaded a bit. I don't necessarily like it but it is what it is. And I feel safe. I feel so much safer that way. Is that wise? I don't know, but I'm focusing on me. I'm not wasting anymore time, because everyone lives for themselves. It's not even a secret. And this ain't even to say I'll never help anyone else, because honestly it's what I aspire to do. I aspire to be in a position in which I'm FORCED to spread the wealth. I want to be the biggest patron of the arts, and I want to increase education and knowledge for ALL. I want to break barriers and blaze trails. I want to be loved. I really do, but I don't want to forsake my own happiness, ever. I want to take the risk and find my niche for what it really is. I'll be great. I'm already greatness.

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

The Ones Who Stayed in Omelas

The knees that knelt
Sacrificing for the greater good
Of the people
Of all
Of everything
Sacrificing their own true happiness
With the thought of the one in misery
Knowing they're there and blocking from their memory the gruesome reality
Except the reality is that they face it
And stay present
And let it not be in vain
So they stay in Omelas
And enjoy the nice things
But at night their dreams haunt them
Nobody really sleeps well here
On occasion we forget
Get a few nights of rest
But it always comes back
And nobody sleeps well here

Read this:

Sunday, October 26, 2014


This Reality

What is it?

Lately I've been feeling a bit insane in my brain. I'm not sure why but I can't pinpoint the exact feeling, the root of this cause, but it's bothersome. Like flies buzzing past your ears as you fall asleep at night.

I don't know. And that's the thing. I try to keep in the path of the righteous, but my demons have been eating me. I wanted to befriend them, I tried to let them be. But they keep trying me.

Thursday, October 9, 2014


Whenever I manage to go somewhere new, I make it a mission to treat myself to something. Today tho, I'm just in the mood for tea, so that's what I have, tea from Peet's. Finally. I made it to the west coast, and let me tell you.... the world done fucked up forreal! My mom was right, I do in fact like it too much, and that's just in regards to the weather and the weed. I don't even know the people yet but the barista at this cafe, Domo, he was sweet, and my hostesses are pretty cool too. So, so far I fucks with it alll the way. It's kind of too good to be true, and that scares me some. With the exception of the sketchiness. Like, idk why but they're sketch as fuck here, or it seems so at least. And just like New York, it smells like pee. It might even be worse here actually. 

However, I still have this looming feeling of disaster. I could just be anxious, cause you know, the future is endless. I've been realizing how dependant I am these last few days. It's wild cause at home I'm praised for my autonomy and independence, but here I feel like I need help with everything. It could be something that's necessary cause I'm new here, but hopefully it's short lived. I like it tho, I have everything I need ya know (Except a restroom). I've been working on telling myself that it's an actual possibility, to have all you need and desire.

The first night I was here, I was greeted with a hot blanket fresh out the dryer and I was in love. I was eavesdropping on a conversation and I'm glad I did cause it changed my perspective a little. She said she don't feel no type of way giving to people cause she lives in surplus. And I'd never really thought of it that way. I'm forever trynna humble myself and do without any extra, but in actuality I might just be denying myself all that's good. It's a hard balance to find when it comes to living the life of luxury and humility. My mom told me I don't always have to sleep on the floor, if I work for a nice bed then I should have it. I think I've convinced myself that sleeping on the floor is better for me tho. It might take some work to reroute my thoughts.

I'm realizing how much I love to talk to people, but not everyone wants to hear it lol. I don't care too much tho, as long as you love me.

Friday, October 3, 2014

The trick is

Figuring out what to say. You have this platform and all these possibilities, but what do you say?

Ideally something meaningful, something that gives some sort of real insight and inspires the masses to do better. Something real.

I don't really want to say too much tho. I know, you need substance, but the simplest things are the most complex right? So why not just say what I fuckin feel like?!

Problem solved.

Monday, September 29, 2014

Eatin Dirt

The other day I flew.
Or I almost flew but then I got scared,
And so I fell forward and skid across the gravel
In a moment I was reminded of the mortal I am
Cause that shit HURRRRT
But in that next moment I thought about the immortal I am
And it gave me a rush
Made me wanna do some more thrillin stuff
Cause life lately has lost some of the... idk. Maybe I just lost zeal
And I hate that I find it in things that probably aren't the best for me
Like causing chaos
Getting arrested by police
Or simply
But fuck it. Love fast die young was once the mantra
However I'm prone to live forever
Just not in this physical state and I'm cool with that
I'm working on my 8th life
(Secretly I'm a cat and curiosity will in fact kill me)

Long story short
... I'm still sore

And I was soooo afraid that my nipples were gone as I was "flying" across the ground

But they were there when I looked, safe and sound

But I got an opportunity to lay on a table and chill with this tree

I don't know why suddenly my phone is underlining everything

But that's my story. It ended nicely, I met a gardener named Lona and she gave me some okra. Turns out I like raw okra. 

Wednesday, September 24, 2014

"You Can Tell You Not From Round Here"

It's funny how I hear that everywhere I go.  Even the place I consider my native land doesn't recognize me as its own. Virginia is the misfit.  For individuals at least.

Oddly, a lot of people tell me I fit right in,  like I belong wherever I'm at, for more than one place. That's valid tho, I'm supposed to be where I'm at right? I don't mind.  But I hate feeling like an alien, proving myself to fit into some niche in society. I guess I'm past the point of proving myself actually. If you like it, I love it and if not then oh well.

They usually love my lack of swagger type swagger tho. Cause they can't figure it out. I'm cool with it. I try n tell em I'm an anomaly but they never listen. They gon' love me tho! They gon' loooove me ;)

Watch out world...

Sunday, September 14, 2014

G40 Art Summit

So.... like I do, I went to this art show solo last night.
Before I start this let me say, I've taken a vow of abstinence until I'm 26.
That being said: I'm stupid. Going to this show yesterday was straight TORTURE. I know, it shouldn't be that I can't have a normal conversation without the intent of sex at the end, but my mind wanders so I'm trynna combat that. I had to overt my gaze with some of the women there cause I stare like a dog at a hydrant. It was painful tho, like I could barely enjoy the art. Even tho that shit was awesome!
Most of it at least. I try not to hate on other artists but I swear I don't understand how some people price things. It's hard for me to see monetary value sometimes. Unless I can account for the actual production costs, I can't see how to determine how much the value is. Not always, but if I see cardboard cut outs for a grand I'm gonna be confused.
I was so excited to see one artist's work. It was a train set th that was all tagged up! Two of my favorite things! Trains. And graffiti. If you know me you should know that. Simple as it was, I told myself I would've bought the whole set if I had the money.
Other than that, the atmosphere was cool. It was held at the Art Whino, I think. At first I wasn't sure if that building was just a place for the show, or if that's the actual place of the Art Whino. It looks like a gay church from the outside and initially I thought "That's where I'm supposed to be!" Then I thought nah.... but I was right in my instinct. Inside was real hip hop, writing on the walls, live dj, not too crowded but just enough people to feel like you're somewhere, had a nice Argentinean malbec and I was in my zone.
Unlike most of my solo adventures tho, I didn't feel completely comfortable. I was alright being alone, but I felt like I wanted to be part of that group. I figured it should've been easy for me to integrate, cause it's just one, but somewhere along the way I retreated within myself. Maybe I was intimidated? I guess. Also, I've become weary of people so I kind of came to the conclusion that if they don't approach me or look like they wanna be approached then there's no need to step out my way ya know.

Monday, September 8, 2014

I'm lying

I thought my first day was today.... turns out it's tomorrow. And I got all cute and everything trynna make a first impression. Whatever tho, it is what it is.
I went and had lunch at this fountain tho. And omg was it gorrrrrrgeeeeouuusssssssss. Like it was kind of overcast and slightly chilly, but it was still warm when it was necessary.
I met a guy tho, he was an interesting one. He led me to this sweet ass park somewhere by Eastern Market. It was such a gem. There were murals EVERYWHERE! And that, my friends, is why I love DC. Cause even riding the bus through the "hood" is a beautiful sight. All the chocolate. I like the other flavors too, but I like seeing black communities ya know. That have interesting dynamics. Dynamics that I understand, but don't at the same time. Cause I talk white.
It is what it is tho. It's whatever right
But both sides of the city are cool. The capital, and the high rises and shit. Those are nice. The areas of the "lower" class are cool tho. Like the flavor is evident.

Saturday, September 6, 2014

Sunday, August 31, 2014

The 2nd Step

That's what's hard. Keeping up with progression. Like Larry said, making it to the top is easy, staying there is the challenge.
I've been solo for a few days now, even tho I've been in the house with my family. I come out of my cave on occasion but mostly I sit in the room and stare out the window.
I've been trying to make shapes in the clouds but I think my imagination is broken because my shapes are forced. I have to think so hard on it. I miss simplicity, but don't we all. I don't like this feeling of constant schemin, trynna make it somewhere. Unfortunately it's what I have to do to get there.
Today is my nieces birthday, and I feel like I'm coming out of this social hibernation. I have to be reintroduced to the modern world, but I'm content not being so deep in it. I don't wanna go back to Facebook or Instagram. Sidenote, I just tried to Swype Instagram and my phone didn't recognize it but Kardashian came up as a suggestion. Why is Kardashian in my phone's vocabulary and Beyoncé isn't? I'm not a die hard Beyoncé fan or anything, but those names are equally abnormal. If anything I actually talk about Beyoncé on occasion, the Kardashians don't make it into too many (if any) of my conversations, so that's just confusing as to why it's built in.
Back on track.
Where do I belong? I need a home. ASAP
Also, I've been experiencing that weird feeling again of missing something, but idk what, or who, or if it's good or bad, but it's haunting. Makes me feel incomplete ya know. I'm sitting outside of the comedy club we came to for Ray's birthday, and I wanna go somewhere, but idk where. I wanna go to love. That's my mission. To find eternal love, there I think I'd be happy. That's why I'm forever walking along by myself. I don't think anyone else would be able to help me find it ya know.
So.... I guess I'll just keep searching. In the meantime I'll enjoy the sights.

Friday, August 22, 2014


The first step ain't even that hard forreal.

I've been talking about making this blog for some time now, and finally... it exist! Not at all in completion, but it's the beginning. So I'm ok with it simply existing for now.

However, I guess I should let you know what I'm here for and what I'm about.

The Social Loner: As many of us are, is one who, although they may know a lot of people, and engage in activities with others often, do a majority of their adventures solo.

That's me, I'd rather be solo sometimes. I take myself on dinner dates in new states, and sometimes I just walk around to see what's going on.

I always see the BEST pictures when I'm alone, so this is where I'll share them, and reflect and shit. I mean, maybe nobody else will care, but sometimes, even tho I'm alone, I still wanna share with someone. This is the perfect platform to do so right?

This way, I won't have to forsake my solitude, but I'll also get to connect with the world outside my head directly.

Maybe none of what I'm saying is relevant, or maybe it won't make sense, but I'm trying to get out of my mind a little.

You are now about to enter the twilight zone.




p.s. bear with me while I figure out this blogging shit